What To Know About Lovino Romano Vargas
by spnaph
Summary: What you need to know when you encounter the man named Lovino Romano Vargas. Let this guide you in your journey to discovering the personification of the Southern Lands of Italy. Rated T for some mature elements in future chapters but this series will generally be light.
1. Fact One: He Isn't Rude (Not Really)

**First** thing you should know about Lovino Romano Vargas is that he does not try to be rude.

He doesn't need to when he has basically no verbal filter.

He won't mean the words that will come out of his mouth though.

 _Well, most of the time._

He won't apologize as well.

He turns red and green at the thought.

He won't apologize if he has accidentally offended you.

He'd rather call Francis "brother" than to apologize for something.

He also cusses like a sailor.

Scratch that, he puts sailors to shame when he sings his melodious and colorful curses.

A trait he may or may not have inherited from his mother and grandfather.

His tongue riddled with explosives will cut you short.

But sometimes, his cussing degenerates to that of a young child.

He will stutter or mumble or become completely incomprehensible.

There are times when he will just physically hurt you, but this action would be his last resort.

So if you ever get offended by Lovino Romano Vargas, know this:

He doesn't mean to be rude.

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 **A/N: I have a new series! I might be dropping my first stories because I cringe at how I have written them back then. I do apologize to those who are still waiting on them. But starting from this series, I'll be writing newer materials. So, stay tuned.**


	2. Fact Two: He Shows Emotion

**The second** thing you should know when encountering Lovino Romano Vargas is that he always shows emotion.

Whether or not these are his true feelings, remains unsolved.

Sometimes, his own brothers will call him bipolar because of how easily he reacts to stimuli.

He is a very expressive person, animated in talking due to his Italian origins, and a loud thinker.

He tries to get whatever he thinks of across but usually end in vain.

On more than occasionally, he will become quiet and recluse.

The usual loudness in his being, dulled and sullen.

Might be from memories or maybe it is a need for his mind, heart and soul to recharge.

After all, it is rather tiring to always have a chain reaction to every day's annoyances.

He will stare blankly, images flashing before his eyes.

Invisible to everyone else but he.

They will call him lazy for not moving or just being in the way.

His face blank as a fresh new canvas, awaiting its turn to be painted anew.

Maybe that's what he wants: to be redone.

After all, he was quite done.

He'll more or less let the jeers at him slide but every one of those comments hang on him like a sticky note but with super glue.

He'll let those mean stares and disappointed glares go but he will not be able to forget.

If he was able, he wouldn't be like this.

Now would he?

And so, he'll let it slide.

You'll get an insult for an insult, a jab for a jab.

He will assume the expected reaction others will expect him to have.

But you should know:

Lovino Romano Vargas always shows emotion.

Whether or not these are his true feelings, is how you make of it.

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 **A/N: The third chapter is still a work in progress since I can't seem to make them all somehow the same tone. I will be uploading another oneshot as an alternative in case I can't submit the 3rd chapter in a week's time. Thank you for reading this. Your comments, criticisms, and general feedback is very much appreciated!**


	3. Fact Three: He isn't Loose (Nor Naive)

**Third thing** you should know if you must interact with Lovino Romano Vargas is that he is not loose.

He isn't prude either.

Leave that to The Vatican.

He doesn't spend most of his time in bed, _if you get what is intended._

Despite what others claim, he is Italy—well, the southern part of it.

And you know the saying "When in Rome, do as the Romans do"?

Well, that all stems from the fact that he sways by the changes happening in his lands but not enough to get uprooted by them.

He goes by what his people deems as moral or immoral.

He connects with his people much more so than his little brother up north.

It doesn't mean that he is loose by that definition.

He simply welcomes the affection.

But he doesn't let himself drown in it.

He doesn't think he is worthy nor if it is worth it.

He knows that too much could lead to consequences.

He knows that too much will lead to his doom.

He knows because of who he is.

As the son of the Roman Empire and Ancient Greece—two of the biggest orgy maniacs of the ancient world.

He knows how many wars were waged just from mere affection.

Passion.

Retaliation.

Death to follow after.

The thousands of lives that ended as soon as pleasure sunk into their skins.

A fear he was certain takes more in his life as a nation as nations tended to indulge in worldly pleasures—a trait they all deny.

He thinks that a person or nation should never drown themselves in their desires.

You can thank The Vatican and his Catechism classes for that.

He knows much from experience.

But he digresses.

One thing to note in this ramble of notes though is that: Lovino Romano Vargas isn't prude.

And he certainly isn't afraid to bite.

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 **A/N: I do apologize for the delay of the third chapter! But here it is. Next up is another oneshot before I post the next installment of this series. Thank you again for reading this. Your feedback is greatly appreciated!**


	4. Fact Four: He is a Klutz

**The fourth** thing you should know when meeting Lovino Romano Vargas is that he is a klutz.

But you cannot blame him for something he has no control over.

You might see him at certain points in time to be lazing around.

But those are just after he's exhausted his energy reigning in his spastic tendencies.

He'd have tried to do his chores but might have broken something in the process.

Resulting in him degrading himself for it and giving up on doing anything further.

He'd have beaten himself over knocking over a vase or a shelf.

He'd have tried to hide any evidence leading to his accidental crimes.

He'd have yelled at you for pointing it out after you'd found out.

He'd have slept away the guilt and shame and self-hatred.

This was the usual setting: the lazy sleeping Italian, the grouch of the Mediterranean.

His self-hatred oozing out of him and redirecting the negative emotion to anyone else within the vicinity.

Trying to find any reason—and sometimes with no reason at all—to blame everything onto other people.

Just to escape his never-ending cycle of self-loathing.

This just makes it harder to stick with such a character.

But sometimes, they stay.

They stay because they know that after that thick layer upon layer of self-hatred lies a lonely and trying boy forced to grow up so quickly by unforgiving times.

Just like that time Spain taught him a dance of a spider—the Tarantella—to cure him of the cause of his childhood hell, Chorea.

One of the very few instances where someone tried to pry away one of his layers.

One of the very few people he counts himself lucky to be with.

One of the few reasons he even tries to do better.

But even without his childhood curse, he was still a bit too spastic.

And sometimes it's too much for him.

So he gives up.

He gives up and sleeps away the pain of being useless.

He gives up, knowing he could not do anything if he cannot control even himself.

But never say that he never tries.

Because if anything, it is the only thing he does.

So when you see Lovino Romano Vargas, know this:

He's a klutz but he isn't lazy.

After all, you cannot blame him for something he has no control over.

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 **A/N: I do apologize for the very long wait for this chapter! College is taking a toll into my creative writing process and also my free time. But I'll try to update as much as I can during this holiday season. Any and all sorts of feedback is greatly appreciated. If you have the time, please leave a review to let me know if you enjoyed or would like to point out certain things and whatnot. Thanks again and stay tuned for the next one!**


	5. Fact Five: He Doesn

**The fifth** thing you should know when meeting Lovino Romano Vargas is that he does not hate people.

He just hates crowds—if there are too many men especially.

You might doubt what this list says when you see meet him in person but what is written here is true.

He doesn't necessarily hate people but he does have low tolerance for loud, overly friendly types.

Perhaps the problem stems from his days with the Roman Empire and Ancient Greece.

The constant parties and orgies accompanied by backstabbing and treason.

The constant images of both soft and forced touches, drowned out screams of panic and pleasure.

And he didn't just see them, he felt them.

He felt all sensations that happened to his people and as a child, it was horrifyingly overwhelming.

Strangers grabbing at him, commenting on his small, lithe body—he shivers at the memory.

He sees older, hairy, sweat men cornering him and asking for his turn.

He remembers one of his older brothers running up to him and scolding the old men.

He feels the hands of his mother, Ancient Greece, pat his head as she talks to him about _pederasty_.

He resents the fact that he went along with it.

He remembers the tremble of his fingers as they were taken by bearded old men trying to relay their "wisdom" onto him.

He forces his eyes shut so hard he starts seeing spots.

Now, if you ask him about why he hates crowds, he'll just answer with a "people are too stupid"

Once again hiding himself through his apparent rudeness.

But for however long it's been, he's despised large parties and touchy-feely people.

He's developed a low tolerance for men, preferring gentle and conservative women.

Because those kinds of women would never touch him like that.

They would never force him to any of that.

He forced himself to believe that.

He had to believe that.

He stubbornly tried to believe in it that centuries later, his perception on whether it was true or not was but a blurry memory.

And so here he was now, stuck living with a forced lie disguised as his own twisted truth.

Here he was now, living as a loner of sorts. Unforgiving of past mistakes.

Perhaps the past in general.

But it should be known that Lovino Romano Vargas does not hate people.

He just hates the people that made him like this.

And maybe, at the back of his mind, he hates himself more for letting them.

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 **A/N: Oh dear, six months went by before I remembered this story of mine existed. I apologize for the delay but here it is! This is probably the heaviest chapter so far. For those who don't know what pederastry is:**

 **Pederastry- socially acknowledged erotic relationship between an adult male (the _erastes_ ) and a younger male (the _eromenos_ ) usually in his teens (sometimes even little boys). It was regarded as a rite of passage in Ancient Greece.**

 **Next update is indefinite but I've got the master list of the chapters more or less complete.**

 **Please Read and Review. Stay tuned!**


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